So the numbness has crept in. I lie awake in my bed wondering whether this is it. I wake, I shower, I drive, I sit, I drive, I play, I eat, I sleep. Now before you get crazy and send me messages on facebook quoting the Psalms like an incantation and telling me that God is in control, keep in mind that I know that already, just stay with me.
I feel as if there is something just around the corner. Something big is about to explode and change the way I see things. That seems odd considering the past few months that our family has been through. I wonder if that was a physical foreshadowing of a spiritual renewal. I wonder if God has planned something so big in my life that an aneurysm seems tame compared to it. Most of the intensity of the situation has died down. Laurie is doing well, she is still missing part of her skull, but all in all things are going well. Our outlook has changed greatly as we see and live new definitions of the words need and desire. I see the need for quality over quantity. I see the need for living our lives in a way that is constant with our beliefs. This seems rather obvious but it has hit me in areas of life that aren’t preached about in the circles I run in.
Should our view of Scripture affect our clothes, our food, our ‘stuff’? I say yes. I say that God does indeed care about everything we do. Where am I going with this? I honestly don’t know…after lying in bed for an hour wondering why I can’t sleep, I came down to write. This is what came out. Not sure what to make of it but I know that I have been praying that God would grant me wisdom as I continue to try to honor Him with every penny I spend and with every word I speak and with every breath I take…and every move I make…and every claim I sta…sorry.
Something big is going to happen. I hope there’s coffee.